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jjpro11
09-27-2007, 07:30 PM
this is too funny. :toofunny:
http://news.enquirer.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20070927/NEWS01/309270023

from PFT

BENGALS WANT TO GO HUNTING

There's a bit of a pigeon problem at Paul Brown Stadium in Cincinnati.

As it turns out, the pigeons have been dropping their business on fans, and in their food and beverages. (We presume that no version of the five-second rule applies when something like that happens.)

The Bengals have a low-tech solution to the problem. They want to shoot them. With guns.

According to the Cincinnati Enquirer, Eric Brown, the managing director of Paul Brown Stadium Ltd., has suggested hunting the pigeons as a "cost-effective way to get this problem under control."

Fan noise on game days used to drive the pigeons away, but the birds have adapted. The bang-bang alternative, per Brown, "would be done discreetly during times when there is little activity in the stadium."

Look, we realize that it's a problem that needs to be solved. But at a time when the NFL is still reeling from the fallout of the Mike Vick case, which involved fighting dogs to the death and the killing of dogs that were deemed unworthy of fighting to the death, shouldn't the Bengals exhaust every other possible option before suggesting the killing of the birds?

tony hipchest
09-27-2007, 07:39 PM
The Bengals have a low-tech solution to the problem. They want to shoot them. With guns.

According to the Cincinnati Enquirer, Eric Brown, the managing director of Paul Brown Stadium Ltd., has suggested hunting the pigeons as a "cost-effective way to get this problem under control."

?will someone please tell Eric Brown it is not wise to score and smoke reefer with, and discuss on the job problems with chris henry? :dang:

stillers4me
09-27-2007, 07:47 PM
Bengals: Let us cut the poop
BY JANE PRENDERGAST AND MARK CURNUTTE | JPRENDERGAST@ENQUIRER.COM AND MCURNUTTE@ENQUIRER.COM
Operators of Paul Brown Stadium want permission from the city to kill birds that have been pooping on Bengals fans.

Pigeon droppings have been falling on patrons and into their food and beverages, according to a letter to the city from Eric Brown, managing director of Paul Brown Stadium Ltd., which runs the stadium for Hamilton County, which owns it.

He asked in his letter that stadium employees who are familiar with firearms be allowed to shoot birds a few days prior to an event, adding that company officials believe the shooting to be a “cost-effective way to get this problem under control.”

City officials are working with stadium officials on both the legalities of killing the birds as well as the means by which they might be killed, said city spokeswoman Meg Olberding.

The bird issue becomes public just as Cincinnati is preparing to again be center stage as the home of a Monday Night Football game. Mayor Mark Mallory is touting the game as a way to highlight the positives of Cincinnati, asking employers to encourage their workers to wear orange and black Monday. Downtown office buildings will be lit up, and 17 downtown restaurants promise food and drink specials.

The bird problem solved itself initially, with fan noise on game days driving the birds away, said Bob Bedinghaus, the Bengals’ director of development. But the birds apparently have adapted. In fact, pigeon poop has become such a big problem around the National Football League, he said, that officials have discussed it at league meetings and stadium management meetings.

"Like every other big building in the city, pigeons make their way to our building,” Bedinghaus said Thursday. “In three of the four corners of the club level, they land and are an irritant during the week. We have to clean up a lot of bird poop. We’re looking for options to rid ourselves of these little critters.”

Brown, in his letter, wrote that any shooting “would be done discreetly during times when there is little activity in the stadium.”

Cincinnati’s municipal code, Sec. 701-15, says no person shall kill, wound, maim or injure any bird. But that doesn’t apply to any city employee or officer acting in accordance with another statute, Sec. 701-17, which says when birds and animals create a nuisance, the city manager is authorized “to use all necessary means” to destroy the nuisance-creators.

Brown’s letter said the bird carcasses would be placed in black plastic bags and deposited into the stadium’s trash compactor.

Several fans who sit in the club (middle) level have complained to the Bengals about getting hit with poop, Bedinghaus said. The birds land on “innumerable” pipes and beams in the stadium canopy - and in the corners of the stadium, the canopy hangs over the seating bowl of the club level.

Other solutions being investigated, he said, include strobe lights, noise makers (which can’t be used during games) prickly coverings for horizontal surfaces, fake owls and netting.

tony hipchest
09-27-2007, 07:59 PM
i heard m. vicks virginia neighborhood had a dog poop problem. :poop:

stillers4me
09-27-2007, 08:03 PM
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v11/sueincinci/bird_poop.png

jjpro11
09-27-2007, 08:19 PM
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v11/sueincinci/bird_poop.png

you should send that in to PFT.. they might use that for their daily pic.

fansince'76
09-27-2007, 08:27 PM
He asked in his letter that stadium employees who are familiar with firearms be allowed to shoot birds a few days prior to an event, adding that company officials believe the shooting to be a “cost-effective way to get this problem under control.”

I guess this means Chris Henry might come back early....

stillers4me
09-27-2007, 09:36 PM
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v11/sueincinci/bird_poop2.png

TroysBadDawg
09-27-2007, 10:07 PM
Cleveland sends it's pigeons downs there to poop. So does Dayton, Middletown, Columbus, most of Ohio's cities, because the Bengals suck them in.

I-Want-Troy's-Hair
09-27-2007, 10:31 PM
you should send that in to PFT.. they might use that for their daily pic.

Here is the e-mail tacobill@profootballtalk.com

83-Steelers-43
09-27-2007, 11:28 PM
Wow, where do you start with this thread? How many punchlines can you lay down on this one? It's just too easy.

lamberts-lost-tooth
09-28-2007, 04:13 AM
Mayor Mark Mallory is touting the game as a way to highlight the positives of Cincinnati
....uh...sir?...Bird poop may be the most positive thing in Cincinnati!

Brown, in his letter, wrote that any shooting ?would be done discreetly during times when there is little activity in the stadium?....
Wouldn't that be the 4th quarter?

Pigeon droppings have been falling on patrons and into their food and beverages
Who thinks that stopped them from finishing their nachos?

stillers4me
09-28-2007, 05:26 AM
Here is the e-mail tacobill@profootballtalk.com

I sent it in last night.

LLT..........:sofunny:
Who thinks that stopped them from finishing their nachos?

I think I heard someone comment just the other day about how good the new green sauce is on the nachos at the stadium.

revefsreleets
09-28-2007, 07:58 AM
I'm surprised there are complaints, given the sh*tty on-field product the Bungals fans have been happily consuming for years.

HometownGal
09-28-2007, 09:03 AM
The only difference between pigeons and Bungles fans is that pigeons are rats with wings and Bungles fans are rats with blings.

TroysBadDawg
09-28-2007, 09:34 AM
This is too funny, WHIO talk radio in Cini just had some people calling in complaing about the about the city concidering allowing the Bengals to shoot the pigeons the person wanted to know if it wasn't against the law to allow known criminal to have guns and to allow them to shoot them no matter what they are shooting. I think he thought they were going to allow the football players to do the shooting.

CB1977
09-28-2007, 12:19 PM
Best thread I've read in a long time!!!!!!!!!! LOL

Couldn't have happened to a better group of fans, players and city! I'd love to see a few of those pigeons dive-bomb Chad Johnson!!! If he thought that getting beer and food thrown on him in the dawg pound was bad......

Just saying.

stillers4me
09-28-2007, 12:38 PM
Found at A Bungals site......

from gregg doyell's blog

How to get rid of pigeons at PBS
Friday 09-28-2007 9:25am ET


Thanks to listener Roger H. for the funniest email I've ever received. Ever.

Top Ten list on how to rid PBS of the pigeon infestation they are currently experiencing…….


10) Send Chris Henry up there with a gun, wearing his game jersey to do what needs to be done.


9) Have Frostee Rucker punch the female pigeons in the head


8) Have Odell Thurman lace their food supply with crystal meth


7) Like they did with Noreiga in Panama, pipe in Mike From Fairfield phone calls and scare the pigeons away


6) Have Reggie McNeal throw up on their feet


5) Dispatch the Bengals medical staff to provide the pigeons with “treatment”…..they’ll never fly again


4) Have Chuck Breshnahan instruct the pigeons how to never get within 20 yards of the people around them


3) Have Chris Henry rent a hotel room and get the younger pigeons drunk


2) Bring back Jon Kitna to explain to the pigeons that God does not want them crapping in people’s beer


And the #1 way to rid PBS of the Pigeons….


1) Have Marvin explain to the fans and media that they are incorrect; that there is actually not a pigeon problem, and that they are simply not intelligent enough to understand the situation.

Preacher
09-28-2007, 12:38 PM
Wow, where do you start with this thread? How many punchlines can you lay down on this one? It's just too easy.

Not really...

the punchlines come so fast that they all tangle up the tongue!

Haiku_Dirtt
09-28-2007, 01:31 PM
Not really...

the punchlines come so fast that they all tangle up the tongue!

The flood of jokes just caused my head to crash.

But on a serious note...everyone but PETA should realize that it's not comparable in any way, shape or form to the Vick Racket.

PigeonGate is a public health issue.

jjpro11
09-28-2007, 03:40 PM
Found at A Bungals site......

that top ten list is hilarious.

yinzer-inseattle
09-28-2007, 06:08 PM
Pigeons tend to shit where there's already a lot of shit. Therefore they should just set up and infinite loop from last year's playoff killer OT on the Jumbotron. That way the pigeons will shit all over the screen and save the fans from the massive reminder of what a crappy organization they back.

tony hipchest
09-28-2007, 06:18 PM
Pigeons tend to shit where there's already a lot of shit. .

in that case they should just put up a giant blown up picture of bengalfans up on the jumbotron...

after all its not the bengals players who getting shit upon.

oops my bad. the seahawks shit all over them and the browns smeared their faces in doggy doo. :poop:

TheWarDen86
09-28-2007, 09:39 PM
will someone please tell Eric Brown it is not wise to score and smoke reefer with, and discuss on the job problems with chris henry? :dang:

I heard they were afraid Bilicheat was going to strap camera's to the pigeons prior to the game.


http://blog.wired.com/photos/uncategorized/pigeon_spy.jpg

TheWarDen86
09-28-2007, 09:44 PM
in that case they should just put up a giant blown up picture of bengalfans up on the jumbotron...

after all its not the bengals players who getting shit upon.

oops my bad. the seahawks shit all over them and the browns smeared their faces in doggy doo. :poop:

All kidding aside, I'm pulling for Cincy this weekend. Logic says I shouldn't (division rivals), but when you weigh a Bengals win against a Patriots win.....Well, since they both can't lose I'd much rather see the Pats suffer.

jjpro11
09-29-2007, 12:48 AM
All kidding aside, I'm pulling for Cincy this weekend. Logic says I shouldn't (division rivals), but when you weigh a Bengals win against a Patriots win.....Well, since they both can't lose I'd much rather see the Pats suffer.

this one is kinda tough.. we dont know if down the road we are going to be playing for home field advantage throughout the playoffs or playing for a 6th seed. i just hope they both beat the hell out of each other like the ravens-bengals matchup in week 1.

Stlrs4Life
09-29-2007, 06:51 PM
What a shitty situation!

TroysBadDawg
09-29-2007, 09:40 PM
I see an upset happening, and the Bungels winning. for no other reason than why not. "Any team can beat any team on any given Sunday." I think the Pats are going to come in over confident and have it handed to them on a golden platter, I hope. Crap then we will be in last place ....... I take that all back I hope they lose.

Aussie_steeler
09-30-2007, 08:33 AM
Why do pigeons get to have all the fun?

I say bring in the big boys of the animal kingdom.

http://www.wayodd.com/funny-pictures2/funny-pictures-the-worst-way-to-die-16P.jpg

Aussie_steeler
09-30-2007, 09:02 AM
Dad, I dont want to be a bengals fan anymore

Please dont take me to another bengals home game, please

http://www.wayodd.com/funny-pictures2/funny-pictures-mr-poops-the-pigeon-maV.jpg

stillers4me
09-30-2007, 09:22 AM
I'm going to have that elephant picture in my head all day.......................:toofunny: