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TroysBadDawg
03-13-2009, 03:09 PM
Have you ever tried to explain the Birds and bees to the opposite sex?

I just tried and failed miserably.


The mother refused to, she told the daughter to ask me about it. Oh God Why me????

Well I tried and failed, she knew more than me.

Stlrs4Life
03-13-2009, 03:25 PM
I fear the day that I have to explain it to my daughter. Hopefully the wife will beat me to it.

stlrtruck
03-13-2009, 03:28 PM
If I have to explain it to my daughter I'm going to paint a picture so grotesque she won't want to have sex until she's been married 5 years!!!

Stlrs4Life
03-13-2009, 03:35 PM
If I have to explain it to my daughter I'm going to paint a picture so grotesque she won't want to have sex until she's been married 5 years!!!



LOL! Should I tell mine that it hurts?:flap:

JEFF4i
03-13-2009, 05:03 PM
If I have a daughter, this will be the talk...

"If a boy touches you, I will find out, and I'll kill him."

HometownGal
03-13-2009, 05:36 PM
Been there, done that, and don't recommend it to anyone! :horror:

Hand 'em a National Geographic from the 70's and tell 'em to figure it out. :chuckle:

NJarhead
03-13-2009, 05:48 PM
Been there, done that, and don't recommend it to anyone! :horror:

Hand 'em a National Geographic from the 70's and tell 'em to figure it out. :chuckle:

lol

I still remember my Mom trying to explain. I let her talk for a little while before I bailed her out with, "Mom, I know." She was a little shocked that I had even kissed a girl at that point, so the conversation from that point was kind of funny.

I don't understand why there actually needs to be a talk in the first place. Like HTG said, they'll figure it out...no doubt about it.

Stlrs4Life
03-13-2009, 07:34 PM
Yeah true, but wouldn't you want it to be you that they find out about it from?

tony hipchest
03-13-2009, 08:19 PM
although i dread the day, i'll just have her watch "clan of the cave bear".

"Ayla *fist pound, finger cuff*"

X-Terminator
03-13-2009, 08:35 PM
Not only did my mom have no problem explaining it, she gave me a condom keychain before I went to college and told me she was too young to be a granny. :laughing: As for me, I'd probably tell her to talk to mommy after taking Jeff4i's advice. :wink02:

SteelCityMom
03-13-2009, 08:56 PM
Yeah, my parents had no problems talking to me about it at all. When I was 7 or 8 they got me a couple of books for kids about sex (the ones with the cartoon drawn adults) and about how it was about love and making kids and stuff, so I knew about it at a young age. They also made me sit down and watch the Nova special about pregnancy, from conception to birth, when I was 13, complete visuals and all. I was embarrassed about that stuff when I was younger, but am glad they took the initiative to do it, it helped a lot in later years of my life.

Now that my daughter has just turned 7 I have thought about starting "the talk" with her, especially since she knows about pregnancy and generally where babies come from...I feel it's time to expand on her knowledge of the situation a bit. Should be interesting lol.

xfl2001fan
03-13-2009, 09:13 PM
I've already given my 9 year old son his sex talk.

I didn't bother with what is involved specifically, because his mother told him that stuff. I waited until after she told him the initial portion (which, incidentally, grossed him out...the idea of being in the same room as another person who is also naked was appalling!)

Instead, I told him:

"Son, we need to have the all important sex talk."

"Daddy, mommy just gave me that talk a few weeks ago."

"I doubt she told you all of the important details. I know you understand about where Babies come from...and what causes them. I want to talk to you about masturbation.

At this juncture, he begins laughing at me, partially with embarrassment...I wait until he calms down.

You know how when you get...excited...your penis get's longer and very hard?

He nods but is laughing and blushing very hard at this point

Well, it's like this. Have you ever seen a really old and worn out rubber band? It stretches a little easier, but doesn't have the strength that it did when it was still new, right? A man's penis is very similar. Instead of being as hard as a frozen hotdog...it becomes more like a cooked hotdog. Not nearly as firm, not nearly as strong...and the end result is that it's not nearly as cool. So, don't masturbate too much. You won't go blind, but it doesn't help your cause in any way shape or form.

My ex-wife was ready to kill me when I returned him home and he went to her for confirmation. Apparently, he thought I made it up. I can't wait til the next Parent Teacher meeting.

xfl2001fan
03-13-2009, 09:13 PM
Bah...computer hiccupped, sorry for the double post...could a Mod delete this for me?

devilsdancefloor
03-13-2009, 11:55 PM
with my daughters if was difficult for me, but i got through it and so far i have just had the tlk with my eldest son. Like i told my wife with boys i gotta worry about one penis, but with the girls it is hundreds. And i tend to scare the hell out of boys 6'4 250 lbs and sying boy you hurt my daughter i am not affraid to go back to jail works GREAT!

SteelShooter
03-14-2009, 12:54 AM
LMAO!

My Father gave me a book and said that he would be back in an hour...........he came back and I told him I already knew. He sighed, rolled his eyes and said "Thank God." He asked if I had any questions and nearly lost it when I asked if he had friends with good looking duaghters!

xfl2001fan
03-14-2009, 09:18 AM
with my daughters if was difficult for me, but i got through it and so far i have just had the tlk with my eldest son. Like i told my wife with boys i gotta worry about one penis, but with the girls it is hundreds. And i tend to scare the hell out of boys 6'4 250 lbs and sying boy you hurt my daughter i am not affraid to go back to jail works GREAT!

Yeah, I'm 6'1 and about 230...I just make sure that I wear my Army Combatives Instructor T-Shirt when I know boys are coming around. Fortunately, none of the few who do come around show that kind of interest in my daughter...but should they try, I'll be sure to let them know that I can "train them" properly without leaving a single mark.

lilyoder6
03-14-2009, 09:59 AM
my brother and i joke around bought what we are going to do when his girl goes out on her real first date... we always refert back to the scene in bad boys 2