View Full Version : This is a "real" Jerk of a writer....
11-08-2010, 04:21 PM
This was printed with other proper picks on page 2 of the Sunday NY Times:
Steelers (5-2) at Bengals (2-5)
Monday, 8:30 p.m.
Line: Steelers by 4 1/2
Get ready for the ultimate Steelers touchdown: Ben Roethlisberger throws to Hines Ward, who tips the ball in the air at the 4-yard line, where it lands in the hands of a Bengals defender, who runs 96 yards for a score. Unfortunately, the referees signal a Steelers touchdown the moment the ball touches Ward, then spend the next 10 seconds debating his Hall of Fame legacy, so they do not see the interception or the touchdown. While some pro wrestling referees arrive to clarify things, James Harrison parachutes down from the upper deck and spears Carson Palmer with his helmet. The officials decide the fair thing to do is give the Steelers the ball on the 1-yard line, where they fail to punch the ball in on three attempts and kick a field goal. The Bengals go on to win by 2. Pick: Bengals
Week 9 N.F.L. Matchups
By MIKE TANIER
11-08-2010, 04:24 PM
Every one of that writer's picks is written in the same sarcastic tone - examples include:
Cardinals (3-4) at Vikings (2-5)
The story so far: Last Friday, Randy Moss insulted a caterer after a Vikings practice, proving that he’s more of a bridezilla than a prima donna. He then interviewed himself after Sunday’s loss to the Patriots, stopping just short of asking what kind of tree he would be. The behavior threatened to upstage Brett Favre’s news conference, so the Vikings waived Moss, because nobody puts baby in the corner.
Favre then appeared at the podium with a rakish scar on his chin; the laceration no doubt causes him a lot of pain when he hypothetically shaves. Favre showed Moss how his generation handled self-aggrandizement, marveling at his own longevity while indulging in long, contemplative silences. Whole generations of fruit flies lived, spawned and died in the pauses before lines like “I’m shocked that I was able to play and move around the way I was.”
In summary: Moss is in Tennessee; Favre will play through a broken foot, tendinitis and a stitched-up chin; the Vikings will keep losing once their schedule firms up; and Brad Childress will start working on his own interview skills. Pick: Vikings
and this writer does not alwys trash the Steelers
Browns (1-4) at Steelers (3-1)
Ben Roethlisberger is back, so we can look forward to all of the Big Ben staples: 15-second intermezzos in the pocket, pump-fakes into the face of oblivion and penitence-on-display sit-down interviews during the pregame and halftime shows. As if on cue, all of the Browns quarterbacks got injured last week, leaving the rookie Colt McCoy (who was so bad in preseason that the team considered cutting him) to face the Steelers’ defense. Browns quarterbacks may not have much skill, but they do have self-preservation instincts. Pick: Steelers
Steelers were lucky the way the Miami call turned out - counting on the refs to correctly apply teh rule is no sure thing and if teh Dolphions would have been awarded the ball I would not have been surprised.
As long as they still get credit for the win I can live with the jabs about how they won
11-08-2010, 05:20 PM
It's called sarcasm - tongue-in-cheek. ;-)
11-08-2010, 06:17 PM
I actually generally like this writer and I get the general sarcasm of the article. I could go along with this if their were any solid stat in Steelers review.
I very much disagree that "Every one of that writer's picks is written in the SAME sarcastic tone." In fact, along with the humour, most of the matchups are actually pretty straight forward.
The Giants (understandably) for example are extolled while the last three reviews are farcical and heap the Steelers in with the 0-7 Bills and the 1-6 Cowboys culminating in complete hyperbole when describing Pittsburgh. The picks are genuine and the only time Cincinnati is mention is to say Bengals by 2.
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