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saveus1011
02-03-2011, 12:13 AM
INT. COWBOYS STADIUM - NIGHT

PACKERS 20 STEELERS 17
2:32
4TH QUARTER

Ben, Hines, Rashard, and Mike Tomlin approach the field and walk amidst the green and yellow mist that surrounds the field. Aaron Rodgers,

RASHARD
I thought Rodgers was a Packer. They're supposed to be green!

MIKE
They're winning the game regardless, Rashard.

HINES
Well whatever they is, they gotta get through us!

BEN
Right!

HINES
Go get 'em Ben!

Hines slowly looks over at Ben. Ben, nervously, walks up to Aaron Rodgers.

BEN
Rodgers the Rodgzarian...good evening. As a duly representative of the city, county and state of Pittsburgh, I order you to cease any and all touchdowns and completed attempts and return to Green Bay or to the nearest convenient parallel dimension.

HINES
That ought to do it. Thanks Ben.

AARON RODGERS
Are you an Elite?

Ben looks back at Hines, then to Rodgers.

BEN
No.

AARON RODGERS
Then die!

Aaron Rodgers raises his hands and fires green lightning at the quartet. They're knocked down the field to their own endzone. They struggle to get up.

RASHARD
Ben, if someone asks you if you're an Elite, you say YES!

HINES
Alright...the Pack are TOAST!

The men line up in formation. Ben sets the formation.

HINES
Let's show this prehistoric franchise how we do it in Pittsburgh!

Ben calls HUT. The team scrambles as Ben starts to run downfield. He's makes it to a first down before he's murdered by the Packers defense. Aaron Rodgers, displeased, disappears.

BEN
We did it! We're going to win the game.

RODGERS (O.S.)
Sub-Packers! Rodgers the Rodgzarian, Rodgers the Destructor, Charles Woodson, the defense has come! Choose and perish!

HINES
What do you mean choose? We don't understand!

RODGERS (O.S.)
Choose! Choose the form of the defense!

HINES
I get it! Real cute. Whatever we think of on your defense, it will destroy us. Ok, I get it. Empty your heads Steelers! We only have one shot at this!

RODGERS (O.S.)
The Defense has been chosen!

HINES
Whoa! Hold on!

RODGERS (O.S.)
The Steelers Destructor has come!

HINES
Nobody chose aything! (to Mike) Did you choose something?

MIKE
No!

HINES
(to Rashard)
Did you?!

RASHARD
My mind is totally blank!

HINES
I didn't choose anything!

All three look at Ben.

BEN
I couldn't help it. He just popped in there.

HINES
Who? WHO just popped in there?

BEN
I-I-I tried to think...

MIKE
Look!

They all look up.

BEN
No! It can't be!

HINES
What is it?

BEN
It can't be!

HINES
Did you screw us again Ben?

RASHARD
Oh shit!

They all see a giant Clay Matthews LAUGHING and marching toward them.

BEN
It's Clay Matthews.

HINES
Well that's something you don't see everyday.

BEN
I tried to think of the most harmless defender - someone I had evaded earlier in the game, something that wouldn't end 7th Heaven.

HINES
Nice thinking Ben.

BEN
I got away from him fifteen times this game alone.

HINES
Ben has gone bye-bye Mike. You got anything?

MIKE
Sorry Hines. I'm scared beyond the capacity for rational thought.

The offense lines up, nervously and calls a play. Ben yells HUT and launches a ball through the giant Clay Matthews. Clay Matthews is set ablaze and reverts back to normal size, defeated.

MIKE
I have a radical idea. They're going to expect Ben to throw. Rashard, Hines, throw a block. Ben, run it in.

HINES
'Scuse me Coach? You said Ben running fifty yards was bad.

MIKE
Ben, run the ball.

HINES
You're gonna endanger us! You're going to endanger Ben's fiance - remember a very nice lady who turned him around before she became a huge slice of cheese!

MIKE
Not necessarily. There's a very slim chance Ben will score a touchdown!

Hines slaps Ben on the shoulder.

HINES
I love this plan! Let's do it!!

The offense lines up. Ben calls HUT and pump fakes three passes. He then takes off as Hines, Miller, Rashard, and the offense block every Packers defender they can. Ben continues to rush for the endzone. He makes it. Touchdown Steelers as time runs out.

END OF REGULATION
STEELERS 24 PACKERS 20

Fireworks explode, confetti booms everywhere, and loud yelling from all the Steeler fans and the sidelines alike fill the stadium. All of the Steelers tackle and hug each other. The players and coaches affix the Super Bowl champions hat on their heads. A few players, including Ben, Troy, Farrior, and Woodley put on the championship shirt.

They all hug and celebrate with each other. Harrison pulls LaMarr Woodley and Antonio Brown to him.

JAMES HARRISON
I told you we'd get you a ring!

Woodley and Timmons laugh and hug each other. Mike Tomlin raises the Vince Lombardi trophy high. He looks up at one the skyboxes and see's Bill Cowher and Chuck Noll smiling down at him. Noll gives him the thumbs up. Tomlin grins and points the trophy at them.

EXT. PITTSBURGH - NIGHT

Various Steeler fans flood the streets of Pittsburgh in celebration.

EXT. HOLLYWOOD - NIGHT

Yours truly runs out into the parking lot with two Terrible Towels in hand and Steeler fans celebrating behind him.

EXT. EGYPT - DAY

Both waring factions in Egypt lay down their arms.

EXT. FRANCE - DAY

A group of French people sitting outside on a street raise their arms in celebration. Two of them make out.

MIME
WELCOME TO LA SEVENTH HEAVEN LE STEELERS!!!!

INT. RAYMOND JAMES STADIUM - NIGHT

Amidst the confetti and celebration, Ashley Harlan wipes the cheese she was turned into off of her. Ben looks at her and runs over to her. They embrace and kiss. Mike Tomlin walks up to both of them.

MIKE
Ben, I hate to interrupt. But you know you have some business to handle.

Both men smile at each other. Ben winks and spins his cap around.

INT. MILLDGEVILLE BAR- NIGHT

A HIPSTER DOUCHE sits at the end of the bar, eating chicken fingers and drinking a Blue Moon. He sips the Blue Moon.

HIPSTER DOUCHE
Hey, Ernie? What's with this garbage I'm drinkin'?

ERNIE, the owner, walks up to the Hipster.

ERNIE
Gee Dan, it's the last I've got.

BEN
Gee, that's funny. I've never seen garbage eat garbage before.

Dan turns to Ben and sizes him up. Ben, completely out of Steeler gear, steps up to Dan.

BEN
Excuse me sir, I think you're sitting in my favorite seat.

DAN
Come and get it rapist.

Ben slowly advances to Dan.

ERNIE
Gee Dan I just cleaned this place up!

Dan slaps Ernie away. Dan gets up and swings at Ben. His fist crashes into Ben's chest, breaking bones in Dan's hand. Dan GASPS and grabs his fist. Dan sits back down in his seat. Ben spins him around as fast as he can in his char. He then picks up Dan and sits him on top of his food and the bar.

BEN
(to Ernie)
This order's to go.

Ben pushes Dan all the way down the bar. Dan slides past the patrons and into the pinball machine at the end of the bar. Ernie and his wife, stunned, look over to Ben.

BEN
Oh I'm, terribly sorry about all the damage, and what happened last year.

Ben tosses Ernie and his wife a cold million in cash. They still look at him, surprised.

BEN
Oh I've been through some changes.

Ben walks out as everyone looks at him, smiling.

EXT. PITTSBURGH - DAY

Ben flies across the Pittsburgh sky. Swaying behind him is his Terrible Towel cape. He's carrying the Super Bowl XLV Champions flag. His destination...Pittsburgh Steelers headquarters. He lands on the roof of the offices. Dan Rooney, Art Rooney II and his client both look up and Ben who sets the flag next to the other six.

BEN
Good afternoon Mr. Rooney. Sorry I've been away so long.

Ben takes a sigh.

BEN
I won't let you down again.

Ben looks up at the flag.

EXT. SPACE

Ben flies from Pittsburgh all the way into outer space over earth. He turns over and spins one more time over the planet toward the sun. Before he flies away, he smiles to all of us.

END

:-P :tt02:

Merchant
02-03-2011, 12:24 AM
:uhh:

saveus1011
02-03-2011, 12:37 AM
Nothin' I ain't seen before!

wootawnee
02-03-2011, 01:00 AM
Dude that was awesome..........Tell the story about Ben and the boys's shootout at the corral......

saveus1011
02-03-2011, 01:04 AM
Dude that was awesome..........Tell the story about Ben and the boys's shootout at the corral......

Next playoff run. :P

California-Steel
02-03-2011, 02:47 AM
You better hope Bill Murry and the boys don't read this. Ha ha ha...Who ya gonna call?!? Cheese Busters!!! Or would it be Pack Busters, or Cheese Packers, or Packer Cheesers...Ahhh the heck with it.:tt02:

Wallace108
02-03-2011, 02:57 AM
Ben is the son of Jor-El? :huh:

http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/41IPZW3TpCL._SL500_SX190_CR0,0,190,246_.jpg

dsr
02-03-2011, 06:49 AM
Maybe I'm nitpicking :yep:, but it'll be four o'clock in the morning in France and Egypt.:saintnick: