-any qb worse than Jeff Garcia was as a Brown- $1000
-any scrub wr- $500
-any good wr-
-any "wr" who thinks he is devin hester on kick returns- $1500
-eric metcalf- $10,000
-kelly holcomb- $25
-any brownfan who rushes onto the field- $100,000
-any battery chucking brownfan- $150,000
-any brownfan who is wearing a dog mask- $200,000
-any center (or other player standing on the sidelines) who has contacted staph and never even played a regular season game- $2500
-kellen "souljah" winslow- $2000
-bruce arians- $1,000,000