Steelers: The movie

[MDSteel15]

Originally Posted by tube517

Omar Epps as Mike Tomlin
Yukon Jack as Keisel
Montel Williams as Hines Ward
Chris Tucker as Ryan Clark
Afa or Sika (either of The Samoans) as Chris Kemoeatu
The Rock as Maurkice Pouncey
Nelly as Antonio Brown
Larry the Cable Guy as Chris Hoke

If he hadn't died, Peter Doyle could have played Aaron Smith! He played Frankenstein in the Mel Brook's version!!

[siss]

Originally Posted by stb_steeler

We all know how hollywood changes the themes to the real life happenings, so if they did a story with Ben in it we prolly wouldnt like the out come. He'd be portayed as rich athlete and a woman chaser and to add some fizz to the movie they'd prolly throw in some court seens as well.......I can see it on Lifetime now!

Oh Hollywood likes a feel good story. So Ben would start out as the troubled playboy athlete who gets in trouble (but deep down has a heart of gold) in Georgia and is suspended. The first 10 minutes of the movie covers everything in Georgia and him getting suspended including the media lynching. The next hour covers how he changes his life, meets the future mrs and bonds with his teammates to have them come together in training camp. The last 1.5 covers the season (including the fines, the injuries etc) the super bowl and the ultimate understanding that even though they didn't win the big game, they gained so much more.

It'll win an oscar!

[tube517]

Originally Posted by 4xSBChamps

Kip Winger will play the role of Mark Sanchez, when questioned by Ms. Goodell if Roethlisberger signed a jersey for him



"... she's only seventeen..."

[ebsteelers]

i'll play the white version of lamarr woodley, hes my favorite player.. plus i just did his sack celebration at work... gotta count for something

[4xSBChamps]

Originally Posted by siss

Oh Hollywood likes a feel good story. So Ben would start out as the troubled playboy athlete who gets in trouble (but deep down has a heart of gold) in Georgia and is suspended. The first 10 minutes of the movie covers everything in Georgia and him getting suspended including the media lynching. The next hour covers how he changes his life, meets the future mrs and bonds with his teammates to have them come together in training camp. The last 1.5 covers the season (including the fines, the injuries etc) the super bowl and the ultimate understanding that even though they didn't win the big game, they gained so much more.

It'll win an oscar!

if this was to be televised on Lifetime, Oxygen, or another short-haired, flat-shoed / women's network, the story-line would be something like this

*******

Roethlisberger is a schmuck, and like most men, he always has-been, having his first sexual encounter at age 13, when he was seduced by his 7th grade female math teacher, her third such offense against young boys:
despite the teacher admitting that she propositioned him, Roethlisberger is kicked-off his Little League team when he fails to sign his-own name onto his-own baseball glove

< fast-forward 15 years, to the curent court proceedings against Roethlisberger >

under cross-examination, Ms DTF changes her story several times, and although her council advises her against it, she winks & requests a 'private-meeting in the Judge's Chambers', with the judge, played by Michael Nouri of 'Flashdance' fame



she also asks that the Judge 'station his baliffs outside the Chamber's door, for privac... er... protection...'

once in the Judge's Chambers, a sobbing Ms. DTF explains about her troubled childhood and growing-up in an above-middle-class home, not having her-own TV until she was 14, then, in intimate detail, repeatedly shows the Judge how the encounter went-down, complaining about Roethlisberger's performance, and then shows the Judge the various acts that Roethlisberger WOULDN'T engage in with her, involving a trombone, jumper-cables, and a chicken

after sharing a cigarette and a shower, the pair return to the court-room, where the Judge calls court to order, finds Roethlisberger guilty, sentences him to hang, then awards Ms. DTF 1/5 ownership of the Steeler franchise:
realizing they are wearing each-other's underwear during the sentencing process, Ms. DTF and the Judge decide to get-married, with Ms. Goodell (wearing a Cheatriot jersey) acting as maid-of-honor upon returning from the Super Bowl, played in Paris

in the flick's final scene, the Judge & Ms. DTF consumate their marriage that evening on top of Roethlisberger's grave, complete with trombone, jumper-cables, and a chicken, as Kenny G plays a saxaphone in the distance:
Ms. Goodell hides behind the tombstone, secretly watching to make-sure the newlyweds don't bump-heads while engaged in the throes of passion, less they be fined $50,000

< THE END >

[El Nino]

bruce arians

[StainlessStill]

I was thinking Lindsey Lohan as the bimbo as well! Great work.

Lloyd Christmas as Bruce Arians.

Hail Marry when we get in the redzone and if we don't get it, punt on 2nd down, Harry!"

[bornaSteelersfan]

To do the movie correctly, it wouldn't be a drama, it would be a comedy. Yes, Will Ferrell will be cast as Ben, Anna Faris as DTF (from Scary Movie fame), Bernie Mac as Tomlin. The Rock has to play Polamalu (seeing him with that wig would be hysterical). Zachary Levi could be Aaron Rodgers. Brandon T. Jackson as Hines Ward. Rowan Atkinson could play Arians. We have to cast Paul Hogan as Dick LeBeau. No matter what though, the ending must be changed.

[siss]

Originally Posted by bornaSteelersfan

To do the movie correctly, it wouldn't be a drama, it would be a comedy. Yes, Will Ferrell will be cast as Ben, Anna Faris as DTF (from Scary Movie fame), Bernie Mac as Tomlin. The Rock has to play Polamalu (seeing him with that wig would be hysterical). Zachary Levi could be Aaron Rodgers. Brandon T. Jackson as Hines Ward. Rowan Atkinson could play Arians. We have to cast Paul Hogan as Dick LeBeau. No matter what though, the ending must be changed.

Bernie Mac is dead! Only Omar Epps is cool enough to be Tomlin.

[bornaSteelersfan]

OK, agreed, Omar Epps is perfect. Billy Gardell as Doug Legursky (Billy is from Pittsburgh). Kevin Hart as Mendenhall. Seth Rogan as Heath Miller. Derek Luke as Mike Wallace. What do you think?