Why register with the Steelers Fever Forums?
 • Intelligent and friendly discussions.
 • It's free and it's quick. Always.
 • Enter events in the forums calendar.
 • Very user friendly software.
 • Exclusive contests and giveaways.

 Donate to Steelers Fever, Click here
 Our 2014 Goal: $450.00 - To Date: $450.00 (100.00%)
 Home | Forums | Editorials | Shop | Tickets | Downloads | Contact Pittsburgh Steelers Forum Feed Not Just Fans. Hardcore Fans.

Go Back   Steelers Fever Forums > Miscellaneous > Fun House


Steelers Fever Fan Shop

Doc's Sports Get FREE NFL Picks and College Football picks as well as Football Lines like live NFL Lines and updated NFL Power Rankings all at Doc's Sports Service.

Steelers Bucs

Reply
 
Thread Tools
Old 02-05-2007, 12:13 PM   #1
memphissteelergirl
Head Coach
 
memphissteelergirl's Avatar
 

Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Inside your brain
Posts: 1,923
Gender: Female
Member Number: 2648
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Default Bad Jokes and Puns-Part Deux

Hey all,

I was listening to "Prairie Home Companion" this weekend and they were doing a show on jokes-where listeners sent in jokes and puns. Garrison Keillor did a really funny skit on bad jokes, so it got me thinking about getting another bad jokes thread started. Here's one of them from the show.

One Sunday in a small town church Satan himself showed up...He came in a blaze of fire and brimstone to the screams and horror of everyone there.

"I am Beelzebub...Evil Incarnate!" he hissed at the peope, walking up and down the aisle "Your worst nightmare."

One old guy in the pews sat back with his arms folded, unimpressed. "You don't scare me, he sniffed."I've been married to your sister for the past 48 years!"
__________________
Memo to all smack-talkin' trolls: "Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt."-Abe Lincoln
memphissteelergirl is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-05-2007, 12:50 PM   #2
sumo
Team Captain
 
sumo's Avatar
 

Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Asotin, WA
Posts: 891
Gender: Male
Member Number: 3047
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Default Re: Bad Jokes and Puns-Part Deux

Horse walks into a bar - the bartender says "hey, why the long face?"
__________________
"You can't handle the truth..."

"The Bears are who we thought they were!!!! ..the Bears are who we thought they were!!!! ...you wanna crown their a--, then crown'em..." Dennis Green - voted Best Damn Quote by Fox Sports and Sumo-2006
sumo is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-05-2007, 01:44 PM   #3
memphissteelergirl
Head Coach
 
memphissteelergirl's Avatar
 

Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Inside your brain
Posts: 1,923
Gender: Female
Member Number: 2648
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Default Re: Bad Jokes and Puns-Part Deux

From a speech of a retirement party for a pharmaceutical company's top laxative salesman:

"Joe was our top sales man, grossing over 3 million in laxative sales, yet he is just a regular guy."

Ba-dum-bump...
__________________
Memo to all smack-talkin' trolls: "Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt."-Abe Lincoln
memphissteelergirl is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-06-2007, 08:04 AM   #4
BOXCAR JOEY
Bench Warmer
Supporter
 
BOXCAR JOEY's Avatar
 

Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Metuchen, NJ
Posts: 338
Gender: Male
Member Number: 3729
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Default Re: Bad Jokes and Puns-Part Deux

" a duck walks into a bar and orders drinks for the house... the bar tender asks, " how are you supposed to pay for this duck?" the duck says " just Put it on my bill"

worst joke ever
__________________

WIN OR LOSE.........I still bleed black and gold.
Http://www.Myspace.com/Trappedinemerica
BOXCAR JOEY is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-06-2007, 08:17 AM   #5
83-Steelers-43
Living Legend
 
83-Steelers-43's Avatar
 

Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 12,993
Gender: Male
Member Number: 1009
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Default Re: Bad Jokes and Puns-Part Deux

If h20 is inside a fire hydrant.. what's on the outside?

k9p.
__________________
83-Steelers-43 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-06-2007, 08:56 AM   #6
memphissteelergirl
Head Coach
 
memphissteelergirl's Avatar
 

Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Inside your brain
Posts: 1,923
Gender: Female
Member Number: 2648
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Default Re: Bad Jokes and Puns-Part Deux

Why did the urologist lose his medical license?

He got in trouble with his pee-rs!
__________________
Memo to all smack-talkin' trolls: "Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt."-Abe Lincoln
memphissteelergirl is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-06-2007, 10:07 AM   #7
lamberts-lost-tooth
Banned
 
lamberts-lost-tooth's Avatar
 

Join Date: May 2006
Location: Midwest
Posts: 10,829
Gender: Male
Member Number: 2363
Thanks: 0
Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post
Default Re: Bad Jokes and Puns-Part Deux

What do termites eat for breakfast?
Oakmeal

How does the queen bee get around her hive?
She's throne.

How do you kill a circus?
Go for the juggler.

Why does a chicken coop have only two doors?
If it had four, it would be a chicken sedan.
lamberts-lost-tooth is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-06-2007, 10:09 AM   #8
lamberts-lost-tooth
Banned
 
lamberts-lost-tooth's Avatar
 

Join Date: May 2006
Location: Midwest
Posts: 10,829
Gender: Male
Member Number: 2363
Thanks: 0
Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post
Default Re: Bad Jokes and Puns-Part Deux

...and my favorite "drunk" joke from college:


Ask me if I'm a tree.
Huh?
Ask me if I'm a tree.
Are you a tree?
No.
lamberts-lost-tooth is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-06-2007, 02:59 PM   #9
memphissteelergirl
Head Coach
 
memphissteelergirl's Avatar
 

Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Inside your brain
Posts: 1,923
Gender: Female
Member Number: 2648
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Default Re: Bad Jokes and Puns-Part Deux

Did you hear about the guy who was diagnosed as psychoceramic? Yep, he was a real crackpot. !

Ba-dum-bump!
__________________
Memo to all smack-talkin' trolls: "Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt."-Abe Lincoln
memphissteelergirl is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-07-2007, 08:41 AM   #10
floodcitygirl
Team Owner
 

Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Cincinnati, Ohio
Posts: 2,752
Member Number: 1784
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Default Re: Bad Jokes and Puns-Part Deux

Quote:
Originally Posted by Lloydfan4life View Post
A guy goes on vacation to the Holy Land with his wife and mother-in-law.

The mother-in-law dies.

They go to an undertaker who explains that they can ship the body home but that it?ll cost over $5000, whereas they can bury her in the Holy Land for only $150.

The guy says, ?We?ll ship her home.?

The undertaker asks, ?Are you sure? That?s an awfully big expense and we can do a very nice burial here.?

The guy says, ?Look, 2000 years ago they buried a guy here and three days later he rose from the dead. I just can?t take that chance.?
That's not a bad joke Lloyd...it's really pretty funny!
__________________


Thanks to MeanJoe for surprising me with my new sig.
floodcitygirl is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT -5. The time now is 02:36 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Shoutbox provided by vBShout v6.2.1 (Lite) - vBulletin Mods & Addons Copyright © 2014 DragonByte Technologies Ltd.
User Alert System provided by Advanced User Tagging v3.0.8 (Lite) - vBulletin Mods & Addons Copyright © 2014 DragonByte Technologies Ltd. Runs best on HiVelocity Hosting.
Navbar with Avatar by Motorradforum
no new posts