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Old 09-11-2009, 08:37 AM   #1
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Default A Rant on Football

Gripes of a Non-Steelers’ Fan: A Rant on Football
Submitted by Chris Goodman on September 10, 2009 – 4:01 pmNo Comment.

By Macwagen

“Gentlemen, it is better to have died a small boy than to fumble this football” – John Heisman Herd mentality isn’t the right phrase, but it’s the first one that comes to mind. I stand in line at the grocery store, surrounded by black and gold, and I feel like I’m in some sort of an occupied territory. Like they can smell it on me–that I’m not one of them–I am not a sports fan.

I get asked stupid questions like, “How ’bout dem Stillers?” and I don’t know how to answer.

“I heard they we’re thinking about signing that convicted dog-fighter, Michael Vick. The one that played for the Eagles. But since Ben Roethlisberger has pending criminal charges the coach decided against it.”

“I heard Vick apologized for the dog-fighting though,” Call me crazy, call me a traitor, call me anything but late for dinner. I just don’t get the attraction to football.

Maybe I’m bitter because I got picked on by football players in high school? Maybe it’s because I can’t stand loud drunks at bars screaming at a television? Or maybe it’s because I think a lot of fans are fairweather cattle who just wanna wear the shirt and carry the towel and impress their boyfriends or show up their at best friends’ with more “hometown pride.” Any way you slice it, it’s not for me, and I am loath to stand behind those bleeding black and gold in checkout lines, getting pressured into small talk, which usually ends with me stating that I think school sports should lose funding before art and music.

As an experiment and also to give it the old college try, I watched the whole Super Bowl last January. This was the first football game I had ever watched from start to finish. I sat in a post-junk food coma when the Steelers scored the final touchdown. As tears streamed down my friends’ faces and wild screams and howls filled the air, I was still thinking of that CareerBuilder.Com commercial, the one about wishing you were somewhere else, with a woman riding on top of some sort of sea lion or seal splashing through the water. I thought about people driving on the street dodging stumbling drunks with faces painted and towels waving. I thought about being a young overweight boy and my fathers’ friends telling me that I should play football with all that meat on my bones. I wiped a lone tear from my eye and reached for another hot dog. I will never get those 3 hours and 38 minutes back.

I understand comradery. And I understand the need to feel a part of something. I admire the effort that players put into the game, and I do not question their motivation or their salaries. What I can not grasp is the level of personal investment fans seem to have. And I do question the commercialization of what was once an American pastime, with men looked on as heroes, that has now turned into more of a color-scheme based mass marketing campaign with athletes pimping themselves to the highest bidder.


================================================== ================

WTF?! haha!
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Old 09-11-2009, 08:41 AM   #2
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Default Re: A Rant on Football

Quote:
But since Ben Roethlisberger has pending criminal charges the coach decided against it.
Numbnuts needs to learn the difference between a criminal case and a civil case (and a tissue paper-thin one at that). I think the distinction is easily and clearly made, but then I'm not a retard either.
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Old 09-11-2009, 09:08 AM   #3
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Default Re: A Rant on Football

Another fat kid, probably coddled by his parents, a product of the Dr. Spock "there are no losers" mentality who suffers the emotional scars from being handled with kid gloves in his developmental phase, a classic self-imposed outsider who suffers the inevitable later-life social retardation...
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Old 09-11-2009, 10:09 AM   #4
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Originally Posted by revefsreleets View Post
Another fat kid, probably coddled by his parents, a product of the Dr. Spock "there are no losers" mentality who suffers the emotional scars from being handled with kid gloves in his developmental phase, a classic self-imposed outsider who suffers the inevitable later-life social retardation...
Hit the nail on the head with that one.

School sports should lose funding before arts and music?

At least athletes major in something in college that they can have an actual career in if/when they don't go pro.

My ex-gf was a music major in college....she has two degrees...and works at CVS.
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