Why register with the Steelers Fever Forums?
 • Intelligent and friendly discussions.
 • It's free and it's quick. Always.
 • Enter events in the forums calendar.
 • Very user friendly software.
 • Exclusive contests and giveaways.

 Donate to Steelers Fever, Click here
 Our 2013 Goal: $400.00 - To Date: $00.00 (00.00%)
 Home | Forums | Editorials | Shop | Tickets | Downloads | Contact Pittsburgh Steelers Forum Feed Not Just Fans. Hardcore Fans.

Go Back   Steelers Fever Forums > Miscellaneous > Fun House


Steelers Fever Fan Shop

Doc's Sports Get FREE NFL Picks and College Football picks as well as Football Lines like live NFL Lines and updated NFL Power Rankings all at Doc's Sports Service.

Steelers Steelers - Referees    Browns

Reply
 
Thread Tools
Old 07-10-2006, 10:02 AM   #1
Lyn
Banned
 
Lyn's Avatar
 

Join Date: Feb 2005
Posts: 1,774
Member Number: 304
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Default Pet Rules

Pet Rules:
To be posted VERY LOW on the refrigerator door - nose height.

Dear Dogs and Cats,
The dishes with the paw print are yours and contain your food. The other dishes are mine and contain my food Please note, placing a paw print in the middle of my plate and food does not stake a claim for it becoming your food and dish, nor do I find that aesthetically pleasing in the slightest.

The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack.Beating me to the bottom is not the object. Tripping me doesn't help because I fall faster than you can run.

I cannot buy anything bigger than a king sized bed. I am very sorry about this. Do not think I will continue sleeping on the couch to ensure your comfort. Dogs and cats can actually curl up in a ball when they sleep. It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other stretched out to the fullest extent possible. I also know that sticking tails straight out and having tongues hanging out the other end to maximize space is nothing but sarcasm.

For the last time, there is not a secret exit from the bathroom. If by some miracle I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not necessary to claw, whine, meow, try to turn the knob or get your paw under the edge and try to pull the door open. I must exit through the same door I entered. Also, I have been using the bathroom for years --canine or feline attendance is not required.

The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough!

To pacify you, my dear pets, I have posted the following message on our front door:

To All Non-Pet Owners Who Visit & Like to Complain About Our Pets:
1. They live here. You don't.
2. If you don't want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture. (That's why they call it "fur"niture.)
3. I like my pets a lot better than I like most people.
4. To you, it's an animal. To me, he/she is an adopted son/daughter who is short, hairy, walks on all fours and doesn't speak clearly.

Remember: Dogs and cats are better than kids because they:
1. Eat less
2. Don't ask for money all the time
3 Are easier to train
4. Normally come when called
5. Never ask to drive the car
6. Don't hang out with drug-using friends
7. Don't smoke or drink
8. Don't have to buy the latest fashions
9. Don't want to wear your clothes
10. Don't need a gazillion dollars for college, and...
11. If they get pregnant, you can sell their children.
Lyn is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-10-2006, 10:05 AM   #2
BlackNGold203
Team President
Supporter
 
BlackNGold203's Avatar
 

Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Butler, PA
Posts: 2,193
Gender: Male
Member Number: 1217
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Default Re: Pet Rules

GREAT!!

LMAO @ #11.....
__________________
BlackNGold203 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-10-2006, 07:52 PM   #3
SteelersMongol
Living Legend
Supporter
 
SteelersMongol's Avatar
 

Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Ulaanbaatar, MONGOLIA
Posts: 4,083
Gender: Male
Member Number: 2401
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Default Re: Pet Rules

Quote:
Originally Posted by Lyn
... 11. If they get pregnant, you can sell their children.
Oh, my God. Ha ha ha. Good one.
__________________
SteelersMongol is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-10-2006, 08:44 PM   #4
83-Steelers-43
Living Legend
 
83-Steelers-43's Avatar
 

Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 12,993
Gender: Male
Member Number: 1009
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Default Re: Pet Rules

Dear owners of dogs.

You have dogs for a reason. Your not supposed to let them out at 6:00 in the morning on a Saturday or Sunday and go back to bed only to leave them outside for the rest of day only to bark and wake up the rest of the neighborhood. If you do, that gives me the right to shoot your dog with a rifle.

I love dogs, I'm a dog owner but I don't want to hear yours on a Saturday or Sunday morning.....all day long.

Thank you.
__________________
83-Steelers-43 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-11-2006, 01:58 AM   #5
SteelersMongol
Living Legend
Supporter
 
SteelersMongol's Avatar
 

Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Ulaanbaatar, MONGOLIA
Posts: 4,083
Gender: Male
Member Number: 2401
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Default Re: Pet Rules

Quote:
Originally Posted by 83-Steelers-43
Dear owners of dogs.

You have dogs for a reason. Your not supposed to let them out at 6:00 in the morning on a Saturday or Sunday and go back to bed only to leave them outside for the rest of day only to bark and wake up the rest of the neighborhood. If you do, that gives me the right to shoot your dog with a rifle.

I love dogs, I'm a dog owner but I don't want to hear yours on a Saturday or Sunday morning.....all day long.

Thank you.
Ha ha ha. What about those kids with loud bikes or the ones with loud music in their cars? Will you shoot their bikes or cars for us, and kick them out of the neighborhood?
__________________
SteelersMongol is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-11-2006, 03:56 PM   #6
DIESELMAN
Assistant Coach
Supporter
 
DIESELMAN's Avatar
 

Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Land of Sand.....
Posts: 1,114
Gender: Male
Member Number: 1031
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Default Re: Pet Rules

LMFAO!!!!! Funny stuff Lyn.....
__________________


BOW DOWN TO THE BLACK AND GOLD!!!!!
DIESELMAN is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-11-2006, 06:54 PM   #7
SteelCityMan786
SF's Youngest Legend
 

Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Hollidaysburg PA
Posts: 19,587
Gender: Male
Member Number: 541
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Default Re: Pet Rules

Quote:
Originally Posted by Lyn
Pet Rules:
To be posted VERY LOW on the refrigerator door - nose height.

Dear Dogs and Cats,
The dishes with the paw print are yours and contain your food. The other dishes are mine and contain my food Please note, placing a paw print in the middle of my plate and food does not stake a claim for it becoming your food and dish, nor do I find that aesthetically pleasing in the slightest.

The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack.Beating me to the bottom is not the object. Tripping me doesn't help because I fall faster than you can run.

I cannot buy anything bigger than a king sized bed. I am very sorry about this. Do not think I will continue sleeping on the couch to ensure your comfort. Dogs and cats can actually curl up in a ball when they sleep. It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other stretched out to the fullest extent possible. I also know that sticking tails straight out and having tongues hanging out the other end to maximize space is nothing but sarcasm.

For the last time, there is not a secret exit from the bathroom. If by some miracle I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not necessary to claw, whine, meow, try to turn the knob or get your paw under the edge and try to pull the door open. I must exit through the same door I entered. Also, I have been using the bathroom for years --canine or feline attendance is not required.

The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough!

To pacify you, my dear pets, I have posted the following message on our front door:

To All Non-Pet Owners Who Visit & Like to Complain About Our Pets:
1. They live here. You don't.
2. If you don't want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture. (That's why they call it "fur"niture.)
3. I like my pets a lot better than I like most people.
4. To you, it's an animal. To me, he/she is an adopted son/daughter who is short, hairy, walks on all fours and doesn't speak clearly.

Remember: Dogs and cats are better than kids because they:
1. Eat less
2. Don't ask for money all the time
3 Are easier to train
4. Normally come when called
5. Never ask to drive the car
6. Don't hang out with drug-using friends
7. Don't smoke or drink
8. Don't have to buy the latest fashions
9. Don't want to wear your clothes
10. Don't need a gazillion dollars for college, and...
11. If they get pregnant, you can sell their children.

:sofuuny:

Quote:
Originally Posted by 83-Steelers-43
Dear owners of dogs.

You have dogs for a reason. Your not supposed to let them out at 6:00 in the morning on a Saturday or Sunday and go back to bed only to leave them outside for the rest of day only to bark and wake up the rest of the neighborhood. If you do, that gives me the right to shoot your dog with a rifle.

I love dogs, I'm a dog owner but I don't want to hear yours on a Saturday or Sunday morning.....all day long.

Thank you.
HAHAHA. I hate when dogs wake me up
__________________

786 Ways To Score Touchdowns
SteelCityMan786 is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT -5. The time now is 11:07 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Shoutbox provided by vBShout v6.2.1 (Lite) - vBulletin Mods & Addons Copyright © 2014 DragonByte Technologies Ltd.
User Alert System provided by Advanced User Tagging v3.0.8 (Lite) - vBulletin Mods & Addons Copyright © 2014 DragonByte Technologies Ltd. Runs best on HiVelocity Hosting.
Navbar with Avatar by Motorradforum
no new posts